In Celebration of Differents
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I have a really weird talent. I find four-leaf clovers. All the time. I rarely look for them on purpose unless I want to impress my children. I usually find them when I’m doing other things such as working in the yard or waiting for the bus with the kids. When I was younger with sharper eyes, I could even spot one from the window of a car stopped at a traffic light.
I usually pick them, tape them to cardstock, and give them away. Once people get over their initial skepticism that it’s a real four-leaf clover, they are usually pleased to receive it. Believing in good luck, as well as receiving an unexpected gift, has a tendency to do that.
What is it that makes a four-leaf clover so special? If you think about it, they’re an aberration. They’re not supposed to have four leaves; they’re supposed to have three. They’re an oddity. An anamoly. A mistake. Yet we treasure them because they’re uncommon. They don’t look like every other clover.
Many times, the rarest, most extraordinary items on the planet are also ones that turned out differently from the norm. A diamond should remain a piece of coal but it didn’t. The most collectible coins contain minting errors. An animal that’s born all white is a genetic mutation, yet we flock to see it at the zoo.
Now let’s think about people. Which ones do we value the most? Society tells us that we all need to achieve a certain ideal: a particular look, a perfect BMI, an acceptable weight, a common opinion, and behave in the same manner as everyone else. We’re expected to conform, blend in, and be ordinary. Our children are expected to learn in exactly the same way as the other kids in school, taught by a single accepted method. Those who learn differently are excluded or medicated.
Just imagine if we started revering our differences instead of reviling them. No one would feel shamed for looking different. People would feel comfortable just being themselves. Individuals would be encouraged to share their own unique gifts. Thinking in a different way might yield novel inventions. People would finally be prized for their eccentricities. At last, non-conformity could become the new ideal.
“It’s the things in common that make relationships enjoyable, but it’s the little differences that make them interesting.” - Todd Ruthman
Vive la difference!
Comments
Great post, Lisa.
I once managed to get a very religious friend to deduce through logic that homosexuality is perfectly "normal" to the homosexual, and that in fact, their humanity is identical to ours. He then admitted that teaching his children that homosexuals are aberrant because his religion says so was wrong. Now, I doubt he ever acted on his new-found knowledge, but it was joy to watch the confusion on his face as I led him through the thought process give way to wide-eyed understanding. The words "You're right" never sounded sweeter.
One mind at a time. Thanks for this thoughtful post.
Kelly - One mind at a time indeed. It would be wonderful for you to someday post the argument that you used to convince your uber-religious friend about homosexuality. I'll bet many people would be interested in reading that!
Mary - It sounds like you and your husband are a terrific example of people who appreciate differences. Otherwise, how would you have gotten together? I think that, much like anything else, our attitudes and reactions determine our level of happiness within a relationship.
Thank you all for taking the time to read and share your comments. I truly appreciate it.