“Mom, we have to go to Gamestop tonight at midnight,” my son Evan announced last night.
“Midnight?” I responded. “Who goes to Gamestop at midnight?”
“We have to go, Mom. Wii Resort Sports will be there!”
“Well, good for Wii Resort Sports, but we’ll be home, sleeping, like normal people.”
“But MO-OM, we have to go! Wii Resort Sports has FENCING. I want toFence!” He leapt across the living room, arms flailing left and right in movements suggesting that a specialist should probably be consulted.
Failing to see what outdoor lawn boundaries had to do with video games, I chose to ignore him. This might have worked if he’d been in the next county, but since we were in the same house, Evan tried other tactics.
My attempts at continuing to read were interrupted by a loud “Mom!” and the appearance of his face just inches from mine. Nothing messes with my middle-aged eyesight more than having to focus on a face after just having struggled to focus on book print.
“Evan! I’m sorry, but we cannot go to Gamestop at midnight. We’ll go tomorrow. The game will still be there tomorrow.”
“No it won’t,” he pouted. I could see his lower lip trembling.
“Yes it will.”
“But what if it isn’t?” Oh, he’s good; using the Guilt card is always an excellent choice. Just ask my third grade teacher, Sister Mary Julianne.
“If it isn’t, the store will get more of them and we will get Wii Resort Sports then.”
Clearly, this was the worst possible outcome. He dropped backwards dramatically onto the recliner as if he’d just been shot. Finally, I thought, he’s given up on the midnight-thing. I resumed reading.
After a moment or two, Evan sprang from the chair and ran upstairs. I could hear movement in his room above me.
A few minutes later, he appeared again next to me, strategically blocking my reading light so that I’d give him my full attention.
“Here’s an offer you can’t refuse.” He opened his wallet and pulled out five one-dollar bills. He arranged them into a fan and held them up proudly for me to see. “I’ll give you FIVE DOLLARS if you take me at midnight.”
As tempting as that offer was (where does he get this stuff?), I decided to hold out for ten dollars, or a clean room, whichever came first.
“Evan, I’ll take you tomorrow. I promise. Now go get ready for bed.”
He checked his wallet again. With steely determination, he tried to convince me once more. “OK, I’ll give you eight dollars, but that’s my final offer.”
I thought about telling him that if he threw in a clean room and a dog walk, we’d have a deal, but all of the parenting books say that you can never let them win. Or does that advice pertain to Rottweilers and playing tug-of-war?
I can’t be sure because I’m up early and writing this without coffee. Guess who wants to be at Gamestop when they open?
Comments
God does make them cute to keep us from hitting them, for sure.
RATED
One of my most important lessons of parenthood.
One of my best memories from a hard time.
(Though having just been upstairs and seen the horrifying remnants of a sleepover party, I think I'd have held out for that clean room!)
Nora - I know! Those five-syllable Moms are the worst.
Leeandra - Do you mean you'll take the boy, or you'll take the boy to Gamestop? This could be quite a deal!
Cartouche - Ha ha! Yes, what's wrong with me?
Greg - Great story! At least Little G has his priorities in order: books, THEN sleep. :)
Umbrella - Thank you! You can be their Auntie Umbrella-from-afar.
Dr. Spud - You are so right. I played it all wrong. That goes to show how tired I really was last night. Now I wish I had taken him. Right about now, I could have him weeding the garden.
nerd cred - "Sometimes they win." I love that! I guess it's more important as to decide which battles are worth our greatest efforts and holding tight to those. Great story about Borders and the loaf of rye bread. What a sweet memory.
Extrapolating from that, you could have only gotten him to do things for you before you took him, and not after, because, you know, new game and prying and cold dead fingers.
So better you didn't bargain for things you never would have gotten.
Annette - Ugh, sleepovers! I make my kids agree to all sorts of stuff before I ever agree to host one of those.
Mrs. Michaels - I know. I blew my only chance.
btw we have Wii Sports Resort reserved for when it comes out next Tuesday... can hardly wait... too hot to do anything other than swim outdoors, so the Wii helps to de-energize the mice.
I wish I could go to a wii resort for real...sigh
Any item asked for verbally (gleaned from pictures, T.V. ads or friends) was automatically eliminated as a possibility. It eliminated the begging, maintained the peace and they usually got most of what they desired on Christmas day. All winners!
Very cute images, Lisa, proving nothing really changes...
--rated--
And I realize that story didn't entirely make my point - the tantrum lesson was most important for paving the way for me to let them win later on by theirreasoned arguments - NOT by 2yo tantrums. That quickly became an immediate 'lose'. (She rushed to add not wishing to leave an impression of a 12 year old winning by means of a screaming tantrum.)
Gordon - Your bribes sound awfully familiar! The Wii Resort Sports has been keeping my banshees busy for a few hours now. At least they move around while playing it, rather than sitting and becoming vegetative like with other video games.
marcelle - I hear you. Actually, it's been so long since I've been anywhere that Hoboken is starting to sound nice.
Mothership - I like your thinking! I'm going to enforce that No Verbal Requests rule this Christmas. Hello, sanity!
nerd cred - I agree. I actually encourage the negotiations if it's not a matter of safety. I think it teaches them reasoning abilities. I remember a few instances of them swaying me with logical and well-prepared arguments. Sometimes I like to trip them up by just saying Yes right away. It blows their little minds. :)
and on the 'sometimes they win' theme, what i try to do is decide beforehand which ones Lofton is going to win - that way he gets the satisfaction of winning and I don't have to put myself through the ringer to get him there.
I admire your ability to hold the line; I would have caved for sure.
Seriously, though, I have to learn not to cave whenever real tears start to fall. That’s not a great lesson for them (unless we were aiming for a couple of actors who can cry like a tick on cue).
Too funny, Lisa. 9-years old and already quoting The Godfather. Your hands must be pretty full.
Nelly - Sounds like you have, or have had, a persistent 9-year-old in the house.
Eva - He does appreciate the game (he paid for half of it by doing weeding and other chores) and the fact that I took him to pick it up today. He gave me a hug after we'd gotten home and told me that I could play it first if I wanted. Fortunately, he also has a sweet side. :)
fireeyes - Hi, girl! Yes, he's smooth, isn't he? The teen years should be a good time.
LandP - I asked the clerk at Gamestop if they had a lot of people at midnight. He said they had seven people show up. Why do they even bother? It doesn't seem worth it.
Steve - Thanks for tearing yourself away from Freaky long enough to read my post. I think Evan has better negotiation skills but I have more patience so I win. Thanks for the comment on my writing. No danger of my trading writing for the Wii. I'm dangerous with activities that require movement.
Lonnie - Thrilled to see you here! Deciding ahead of time which ones they'll win is an excellent strategy. These kids are bright; it takes plenty of planning to stay a step or two ahead of them.
Laurel - You probably saw that sentence when you moused over my photo. I always put nifty things on my photos that are only visibly by mousing over them. It must only work on certain computers, though. Some people can see them and others can't. Even I can only see them on my desktop computer, not the laptop I'm on currently.
Teddy - I stopped by earlier at your post but wasn't able to comment. I'll stop back later.
Jimmy - Retailers do target the kids, don't they? Each time this happens, it's a lesson in patience for him. Thanks for the compliment on my writing. Compliments from you always make my day!
David - Oh, my friend - enjoy these days while you can. Pretty soon the negotiations will morph from watching Bob the Builder after lunch to staying up late to dying their hair purple to NEEDing a cell phone. And that's all by age 12! I'll spare you the teenaged negotiations. Wouldn't want to scare you. :)
mamoore - Oh, when they all gang up on you, that's a different story entirely. You really need to be on your game. At least you're making them work for it before you give in.
Maria - Yes, he was breaking out the big money for a midnight trip to Gamestop.
Critical Path - Thank you so much! Even though I feel like I need to remain sharp in order to stay ahead of him, some day those skills will serve him well.
Hope he got one after all.
She has played me like a fiddle more than once but I am learning. Oh yes, I am learning.
Waking Up - He might be playing it wrong, but it looks more like beat-the-other-Wii-people-with-your-sword rather than actual fencing to me. If your curtains are sheer, you might want to try something less violent, like waterskiing or archery instead. Wouldn't want the neighbors trying to have you committed.
Lorraine - I don't know where he gets his negotiating skills. Certainly it's not from all of those times I told him to clean his room and THEN I'd play baseball with him (or is it?)
Thank you, all of you, for taking time to read and leave such wonderful comments!
I did this midnight waiting by Game Stop thing about six times now, for both games and platforms. It is mandatory, and those assholes who make these rules know they have the parent by...anywho.
Good post, educational.
Rated
But getting back to your post, this was a gem, "Nothing messes with my middle-aged eyesight more than having to focus on a face after just having struggled to focus on book print." I sooooo hear you :)
bluesurly - Wii-less - oh no! I actually resisted it for a long time. Last Christmas, when all three of them wanted it, it saved me money since I could split the cost over three kids. It's actually very cool and it gets them moving instead of just zoning out in front of a screen. Thanks for stopping by. :)
Faith - Thanks for commiserating. These kids are sharp, aren't they? It's getting tougher to stay a step ahead of them.
Harvey - Ha ha! Thanks for your kind words. I keep telling Evan to be sure that he only uses his powers of negotiation for good, not evil, purposes.
(Originally Posted on Open Salon - Editor's Pick)