Our family recently celebrated
Easter, but no one dyed any eggs. No one
even asked about them. I didn't hide
colorful plastic eggs filled with coins in the back yard, either, and no one
even mentioned it.
This took me by surprise because
we have done these things every single year for the past 20 years, ever since
my oldest son was small. As his brothers
grew, they joined the fun, too. It's how
our family celebrated Easter. It was
predictable and comforting.
My boys are older now, and
traditions that used to define our family holidays now feel outdated. The last time we did the egg hunt, for
example, I had to wait for all of them to wake up. Since when did sleep become more alluring
than an Easter egg hunt?
Sleeping late on Easter Sunday
was unheard of when my kids were younger.
Each one would bounce down the stairs before I'd even had a chance to
finish my morning coffee, eager to see who could find the most eggs. Afterward, they'd crack open their haul on
the living room floor and count the treasure inside, amid a sea of colorful
eggs.
I wish I'd known that the last
time we colored eggs together or had an egg hunt that it was truly going to be
the last time. I would have paid more
attention. I would have taken more
pictures. I would have recorded their
laughter.
I would have been fully present.
Instead of enjoying time with my
children, I was no doubt thinking about what was next: making brunch, straightening the house, or visiting
with family. Activities were always
something to get through, to tick off the To-Do list, so that we could all move
on to the Next Thing. So much of life
slips by while waiting for the Next Thing.
We realize too late that it was really the first thing, that ordinary
morsel of life, that mattered most.
I can't rewind and bring back the
days of laughing kids collecting colored eggs on the lawn, but I can resolve to
be a more active participant in my own life going forward. When I'm with my kids, I want to truly be with
them: awake, aware, and involved. I want
to feel the messy parts as well as the happy ones.
(photo by Lisa Kern)
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